VS 1

"Give your hands to serve and your hearts to love" - Mother Teresa

I reached at rumah anak yatim RKK early so thanks to the traffic. There were a few volunteers already there. Seeing all the cute faces came to me nak salam and hugs ahhhhh melting. Lupe terus pasal nervous. The session started a few minutes later, when our Project Manager (PM) arrived. Then, the kids were divided into groups according to age. There were about 20+ of them between 4 to 12, all girls! Semua pon malu2 taknak duduk dengan abang2, nak kakak nak kakak.

The plan for that night was to review their exam papers and check if they have any homework to do. But it was not so formal because most of them had done with final exams and had packed their books. So I began with two kids sat in front of me, KH and PU. KH is 8 years old and PU is 5 years old. PU sangat gigih buat homework, she had to write 1-100 in her mathematics book. PU is veryy outspoken and smart. At her age, I think she has a nice handwriting, buat kerja pon laju je. But, she needed extra attention.  Everytime she wrote one number, she will asked me the next one, eventho she knew the answer.
"Kakakk, lepas ni no berapa?"
"Kakakk tengok la saya tulis ni betul tak?"
"Kakakk, tolong la saya buat ni"

Whereas, KH is a bit passive, so pendiam and sangat sesuatu. Dia asik cakap die bosan. Otak saye pon ligat berpikir what to do. Dah la tak tau syllabus darjah 2 belajar apa. and thank God tiba2 ting!! I got an ideaa. To teach her Colors in English.
"Alaa kakak saya tak tau, saya cuma tau merah, red je"
So I asked her to list down all the colors she saw in that room. Then I taught her how to say it in English. That session lasts a few minutes until the PM distributed Mathematics books for everyone.

KH saw my Uno Stacko and kept checking my bag. First time saya tegur biasa "Eh, jangan kacau barang kerja kite tu", the second time pon biasa2, and the third time, tak berniat pon nak marah but maybe dah terbiasa suara kasar tiba2 she asked me with an innocent voice in a very low tone "Akak, akak marah saya ke?"

Ahhhh I didnt mean to. I mean ok I forgot that they're different. I played with kids a lot, I have a lot of little cousin, but I forgot that I can't treat these kids like how I treat my lil cousins. These kids are different. We never know what they keep inside. We never know what that tiny body had gone through in life.

I felt so guilty. Beyond words.